Lindsey France
About Mission Year
Mission Year is a year long urban ministry program focused on Christian service and discipleship. We take teams of young people, place them in an area of need, and help them to serve people and create community. We are committed to the command of Jesus to “love God and love people,” by placing the needs of our neighbors first and developing committed disciples of Christ with a heart for the poor. Learn more about our first year program…
Lindsey France's Blog
an account of affirmation / Apr 17, 12:03 PM
Recently, I’ve had the blessing of “facilitating” morning devotions at the Joshua Center a few times a week. The moments we spend singing a capella, reading God’s word, and praying together have been vital to my deepening relationships with the ladies. It has given me the opportunity to be vulnerable with them as they have been with me. In exposing my weaknesses, I am also able to share with them the reason I breathe, laugh, cry, and sing. But it isn’t what I share that really matters. In the last few weeks, it has been beautiful to see the women taking over devotions. Most mornings I barely get a word in! God has been working miracles in their lives and they cannot help but testify to His goodness. Morning after morning, I am brought to my knees at the throne of God by their wisdom, faith, and honesty.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how God brings people crashing together. I think if it weren’t for those violent collisions that foster relationships, we would all likely be hermits. (Maybe I’ll further develop this very vague thought in another blog someday soon…)
Friday morning, I wasn’t exactly bubbling over with encouraging thoughts or words. So, I sat down with the ladies and asked them to share what God had been teaching them throughout the week. Laura, a new guest who has a great sense of humor and a fantastic southern accent, asked to share. The day before, she talked with me about her life, struggles, and doubts. A fellow guest had spent some time studying the Bible with her on Thursday evening and they had read Matthew 5.
She shared a beautiful perspective of Matthew 5:14-16. She told us of a time when she had been beaten very badly and left at the bottom of a hill beside a road. It took two days for her to climb to the top of the hill. When she did, she saw the lights of an ambulance that was responding to another call. They saw her and took her to the hospital. She said she feels like she is still crawling to the top of the hill spiritually, Jesus at her side. And one day, she will be the light of the world, the city on the hill. (Well, I think she is already a light…but, you know.)
Ok, so, about that collision. Billie, a quiet and wise woman who has been here for some time, spent the week trying to make the decision to move to Kansas for a job or to pursue a housing opportunity here in Chicago. Friday morning, she told me that she had made the decision to move. After Laura and several others shared, we gathered around in a tight circle and prayed for Billie.
A few hours later, I was in the computer lab with some of the ladies when Billie came to me with a single piece of paper in her hand and an unmistakable light in her eyes. She had been reading a “prophecy bulletin” and the day’s encouragement read as follows:
“As spring calls forth new growth, so I am calling you to come forth in new life and strength. Quiet your soul and hear the sound of My voice and the power of My purpose will be revealed in you. You are about to emerge from the darkness of past days into the light of life and increase. Prepare your heart to truly release yourself from the past and personal history, for this is necessary prerequisite to your progression, says the Lord. Matthew 5:14-16 says, “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lamp stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in Heaven.”
So, again I was amazed at God’s power and faithfulness. He often uses the most unlikely people to speak words of truth and affirmation into our lives. Just listen.
in joy or pain, i need thee / Apr 10, 10:12 AM
“One day as a young wife and mother of 37 years of age, I was busy with my regular household tasks. Suddenly, I became so filled with the sense of nearness to the Master that, wondering how one could live without Him, either in joy or pain, these words, “I Need Thee Every Hour,” were ushered into my mind, the thought at once taking full possession of me.” (Annie Hawks)
I’ve found myself humming this song endlessly the last few days. I love that it was written by an ordinary woman on an ordinary day. I am beginning to recognize this burning need in myself — whether I am in the midst of my daily routine, a moment of pure joy, or bitter disappointment, I am always in a state of utter desperation for God (though I may not always realize it).
“I need Thee every hour, most gracious Lord;
No tender voice like Thine can peace afford.”
Be still. Know that I am God. These things I have told you so that you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But, take heart. I have overcome the world. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, be thankful and lift up your prayers to me and My incomprehensible peace will quiet the chaos in your mind and calm the turmoil in your hearts. Seek solitude. Find silence. Listen. My gentle whispers will satiate your desperate need for peace.
“I need Thee every hour, in joy or pain;
Come quickly and abide, or life is in vain.”
It is outrageous that my felt dependence on God changes with as my circumstances and emotions change. When I am filled with joy, I am in just as great a need of God as I am when I am filled with despair. In agony or in ecstasy he is my strength, my joy, my peace. My needs may be different, but I am desperate for him all the same. He is all that I need, and all that I want. Without him, my life is void of purpose.
“I need Thee every hour; teach me Thy will;
And Thy rich promises in me fulfill.”
Teach me Thy will. Fulfill your promises in my life. Not my own, but yours. Though I am weak and unworthy, though I tremble and doubt, I am yours. I need you. Whatever may come, where ever you may lead me, I trust that you will be enough for me. Have your way in my life.
“I need Thee, oh, I need Thee. Every hour I need thee. Bless me now my Savior, I come to Thee.”
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hold my hand / Apr 1, 10:47 AM
If you’ve heard anything at all about my Mission Year experience, you have undoubtedly heard about Gloria, Zaria, and ZJ, the three bundles of joy who live downstairs. They are constant sources of laughter, awe, frustration, and shock. It has been such a beautiful experience to watch them grow in the last seven months. Zaria has the wit of a sixteen year old. She is always vying to be the center of attention. She’ll do just about whatever it takes and she often entertains us by singing, dancing, or preaching. Gloria is inquisitive, funny, and beautiful. Last night, she curled up with me in a big chair and whispered secrets into my ear. She asked questions that were incredibly difficult to answer and got really excited when I told her that when she went to sleep, Sarah and I are in the room right above her sleeping too.
Then we have ZJ. When we arrived in Chicago, ZJ spoke only in baby babble. Over the last few months, it has been incredible to see his vocabulary expanding by the minute. One evening this week, I was walking down our block after work and I was delighted to see that the family was just getting home. I hadn’t seen them since I left for break. When he saw me, ZJ ran up to me, jumped up and down and said, “Hey Lindsey!!”
My heart stopped. No really, it did. He had never said my name before. This was a monumental moment.
I didn’t think anything could be more precious. That was until last night. Now that he can say my name, ZJ can get me to follow him just about anywhere. His favorite phrase last night (well, except for “sit down!”) was “C’mon Lindsey!” At one point, I was sitting down and he crawled up into my lap. “Hold my hand, Lindsey!”
Oh my. What beautiful words. After explaining to him that he was the only boy whose hand I would hold (remember, Mission Year has a no dating policy…), I held BOTH of his hands and planted a big kiss on his cheek.
I love those kids so much.
on the other side of the wall / Mar 5, 09:50 AM
As the year moves forward, I am finding it more and more difficult to articulate my feelings, observations, or experiences. I can no longer compartmentalize and rationalize life. (Of late, this has caused quite a dilemma as I can’t seem to remember much of anything that is pertinent to the practical realm of life. My team would be happy to tell you stories of this, I’m sure. Jordan asks me on a regular basis, “Hey, how’s your brain?”) Existence and all of its decisions and impulses, its victories and mistakes, its pain and joy, its tragedy and delight is indefinable. I often need to escape into solitude and attempt to organize all of the thoughts swirling around in my mind into neat little categories. Try though I might, I cannot separate the pain from the joy or the chaos from the peace.
Unfortunately, many of us spend our lives trying to do just this. We move away from the impoverished, we close our eyes to injustice. We pretend all is well. More so, we blame those who are in need not only for their own suffering but for the world’s problems. They’re the people who are failing high school, filling the jails, and burdening the welfare state, right? To justify our distance from them, we remind ourselves that we have worked hard, we have followed the rules, we deserve it.
Jason Upton has a song called “Lullaby for a Petrified Sacred Society.” In it, he talks of the walls that the American church has built up around it to protect it from the world. One line is, “we’ll all sleep well tonight, no worry for tomorrow, safe in our panic room.” We have surrounded ourselves with beautiful church buildings, unwavering theology, and an instilled fear of anything that walks or talks differently than we do. Our attempt at alleviating man’s suffering sometimes goes only as far as a tract or a pitying smile. Ten percent of our income satisfies our financial responsibility to God and his children. And when we read the newspaper in the morning, we forge sympathy for the children dying in Uganda and force a tear for the innocent woman killed in gang violence. It all works really well. On the surface, we have never been happier. It seems we have finally managed to reconcile our religion and our longing for earthly treasure and acceptance.
Sadly, it doesn’t satisfy the deeper longing within us for authenticity and love. Tragically, it ignores the very essence of the teachings of Jesus Christ. In using religion to serve as yet another way to feel good, we inevitably miss out on the abundant life that we are searching so desperately for.
If we truly believe that Jesus Christ came to save humanity, if we really believe that he came to reconcile the lost children to his father, then we must tear down the walls. We cannot continue throwing food over the barricades to the less fortunate and we cannot continue shouting Bible truths from a safe distance through a megaphone. It isn’t about pity and charity. This is about equality, relationships, and reconciliation. The reconciliation of all people and things, the peace that passes all understanding, the wholeness of mind, body, and spirit. That is shalom.
If we continue to shut ourselves in our “panic rooms,” we are essentially saying that we are superior and that those Jesus came to heal are insignificant. And we are saying that God is a liar. We need to reexamine our approach to our faith. We need to read the Bible in its unadulterated form, unmarred by our opinions and desires. We need to recognize that our pain and joy, affluence and poverty are inextricably connected. We need to walk hand in hand, rejoicing and mourning together, as we continue our journey. When we do, we will find abundant life. We will find shalom. We will be reconciled to God and to our brothers and sisters.
I’m trying to understand this. I’m trying to live this. I praise God for you who are helping to guide me and encourage me. Thank you. I love you.
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they said it was my birthday... / Jan 31, 03:31 PM
Yesterday was my 20th birthday. I think 20 is an awkward age, but I’ve never minded awkwardness much. Anyway, it proved to be a beautiful day that reminded me that I am exceedingly blessed to have such amazing family and friends.
So, a short summary of my day(s) would begin with my waking up at 6:20 Tuesday morning to stagger my way into the bathroom for my (daily) shower. Fifteen minutes later, I swung open the door and found balloons hanging in the dining room, over Sarah and my bedroom door and over my bed. In addition, a big sheet of paper was laying on the dining room table bearing the greeting, “Happy birthday!” with a (mostly) sweet note from each of my housemates. They don’t know it (yet), but a tear or two definitely escaped.
Sarah, Joe, and I headed off to work and found ourselves strolling along in 48 degree weather. Although Monday and Tuesday were an appreciated reprieve from the recent 5 degree weather, they made me all the more eager for spring. (Let me now interject that upon walking home from Bible study later in the evening, the weather resembled the apocalypse. There was a forecasted 49 degree temperature differential from 7am to 11pm. Hello, Chicago.)
At work, the ladies sang Happy Birthday to me. I’m not really sure how to express how much that alone meant to me. It occured to me as they were singing that God has truly led me to the fulfillment of my desire by bringing me to this place.
Later in the evening, my team made dinner. Spaghetti for themselves and for me…a big plate of none other than scrambled tofu! And, after Bible study, they suprised me again with cheesecake and fruit — blueberries, blackberries, and raspberries (my favorite).
I was also privileged to receive a visit from the newly turned 5 year old Zaria and her wonderful 6 year old sister, Gloria. Joe and Nick played some songs for them on the guitar and we all danced, swirled, twirled, and giggled together. The delight and joy on their faces (and ours) was unforgettable.
So, after receiving phone calls from my wonderful parents (who, along with my grandparents had cake on my birthday…) and my friends (Ryan kept up the tradition by calling to play for me “They Say It’s Your Birthday” by the Beatles. Love it!), I thought all birthday celebrations would come to a cease. But today during lunch, I was obliviously eating mashed potatoes when the ladies again burst out in “Happy Birthday.” Now, today is Charlene’s birthday…so, I sang along…until they added “and Liiiiiiindseyyyy” to their song. Surprise! They gave me a bouquet of flowers, a bag of chocolate, a balloon, and a beautiful card. ...I am so blessed.
My, my. I have been contemplating what it is that I really want to seek to learn this year. I have always said that I need to learn to be concise. I never intend to write novels. :-)
So, I will end. And hopefully it won’t be so long until I write again. Thank you all for your love. May your eyes be opened to see the blessings of God that wait for you at every turn and that sustain you with every step.
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