Tanya Downard
Why Mission Year?
Like everybody else who has chosen to participate in Mission Year, I have the desire to find out what it’s like to truly live like Jesus did. I’m done with the emptiness that comes with living for myself. I want to have the eyes to see that every single person in this world, no matter the skin color, ethnic backround, religion, etc, is not just somebody that I pass by on the street, but they are my brother or my sister. I want to love God above all things and to love my neighbor as myself.
What actually led me to Mission Year was reading and learning about the lives of people in this world such as Shane Claiborne, Brandt Russo and so many others who have actually decided to take the words that Jesus says in the Bible seriously and to live like He really meant them. I saw Shane speak at Ichthus Music Festival in June and my perspective of life and how I should be living has totally transformed since that day.
So this is all very recent for me. I learned about, thought and prayed about, and applied to Mission Year just a matter of weeks ago. And since then, everything regarding Mission Year and my participation in it has totally worked itself out. I know this is what God has called me to do. There are people in this world who are way better with words than I am, and are better at missionary work than I probably ever will be. But God chose me for this. He wants me in Chicago, living and loving the people there and I truly can’t express in words the excitement and the faith that alone gives me.
Here’s just a little about myself. My names Tanya. I’m 19 years old. I work as a nursing assistant at a nursing home here in Louisville, KY. Since working there I have discovered that I have a passion for serving the elderly that I had never even realized before. I also absolutely love helping out with the youth at my church and enjoy being around kids in general. I have the most amazing family and greatest friends. God has also blessed my life with my soul mate, James, who has been the most loving and supportive person through all of this.
I am beyond ecstatic for the opportunity to be a part of this mission year. I will be leaving in less than a month now and I’m getting more excited every day. I can’t wait to meet my team mates and to get to know my neighbors and the church family I will become a part of. I know there is so much that I have yet to learn about being a true disciple of Jesus and I have faith that Chicago will open my eyes and teach me all those things and more.
Please pray for me and my team mates as we serve in Chicago this year!
Love always,
Tanya
About Mission Year
Mission Year is a year long urban ministry program focused on Christian service and discipleship. We take teams of young people, place them in an area of need, and help them to serve people and create community. We are committed to the command of Jesus to “love God and love people,” by placing the needs of our neighbors first and developing committed disciples of Christ with a heart for the poor. Learn more about our first year program…
Tanya Downard's Blog
satan in disguise / Dec 18, 09:37 PM
So I’m surprised that I’m still able to post a blog, but here it goes.
I left Chicago and have been back in Louisville now for almost 3 months. I came into Mission Year so excited and so ready to allow God to use me in whichever way he wished. I left all my loved ones here, and against some of their wishes, went to live in the inner city of Chicago. I was only there a month, and I can honestly say that it was the best month of my entire life.
So, what happened and why aren’t I there anymore? This is a question that I still ask myself almost daily. When I left for Chicago, I had just come out of a very long, stressful, controlling relationship with my boyfriend James. Well, long story short, about 4 weeks into my life in Chicago, James shows up in Chicago unexpectedly on Sabbath. Against the wishes of my team, I meet up with him and we have a very long emotional talk that ends up in us back in a relationship that night.
The week following his visit was extremely hard for me. Somehow my heart and mind had shifted from being in Chicago and focusing on what I was being called to do, to having my boyfriend back and missing him and wanting to work on our relationship. At that point even though my heart was in Louisville with him, I still knew that I was supposed to be in Chicago, loving and serving God and the people there. James showed up again the next week on Sabbath as well. I left early in the morning and we spent the whole day talking and catching up. This was when he brought up the idea of me leaving Chicago to come back and be with him and start our life together. Without any hesitation, I told him no way, I was staying in Chicago and there was no talking me out of it. And somehow, without me even realizing what was happening, the entire rest of the day was spent persuading me that God wanted me in Louisville. My mom called during the course of that day too, and just when I needed someone to tell me to follow my heart and listen to what I knew was right and to tell me to stay in Chicago and stick it out, she was with James, telling me that it was unreasonable to assume that I could have a relationship that would last the rest of the year, unless I was physically there to work on it.
So after a couple more hours, tons of crying and arguing about it with James, and the people I love begging me to come home, I gave in. And with tears in my eyes and my hands shaking, I called Shawn and told him I was leaving. I knew it was the wrong decision the moment that I made it. I knew that I was letting people down either way. I knew that I would be letting the AMAZING, LOVING people that I had met and been living with in Chicago down. But what didn’t hit me until I was in the car on my way home, was that I had let God down.
Satan came to me that day, disguised as someone that I love, and persuaded me to leave and I will always regret it. I not only cried almost the entire 5-hour drive home, but many times since then. If I had it to do again, I never would have left. I didn’t pray about it before leaving or talk about it with any of the people in Chicago who loved and cared about me, and because of that, I made the mistake of leaving and letting God, myself and everybody in Chicago down.
It hurts to not be there and it hurts to know that I let so many people down. I miss East Garfield Park, Chicago, and all the people there, especially team EGP.
Jeff, Ashleigh, Meredith, Carrie and Pedro: It was such a blessing getting to know each of you. There are truly no words to express how sorry I am for leaving and how much I miss you guys. I didn’t deserve the kindness and the love that every one of you gave me the night I left. I took all of your words of advice and encouragement to heart. I am a better person for knowing you all. Not a single day goes by that I don’t pray for you and for what you are doing in East Garfield Park.
To Shawn and to Mission Year: It was an honor to be a part of Mission Year for the time I was there. You are all angels and I have nothing but love and respect for the amazing M.Y. staff. I made a horrible mistake and I would take it back in a heartbeat if I could.
For a positive note, since being back in Louisville, James and I are doing great and our relationship has truly changed for the better. We have started a Love Alliance group in Louisville and had the honor of hosting Brandt Russo for a screening of his “Adopt a Jesus” film this past weekend. We are still leading youth group/worship at the church and are starting a clothing closet for the people in need in the church community. I have become involved in ministries like World Vision, Sunrise Children’s Services, and the Big Brother/Big Sister program here in Louisville. I am also hoping to go on a mission trip to Uganda sometime in the near future.
To any current or future Mission Year team member: Listen to your heart. God called you to Mission Year at such a time as this for a reason. Don’t make the mistake of letting Satan mislead you and knock you off of the path of following Jesus. PRAY and consult with your team mates and city director before making big decisions that affect everybody around you. But most importantly, trust God and know that you have been called to love Him and love others and that NOTHING ELSE MATTERS!!
17 days!! / Aug 12, 11:01 AM
So in 17 days, I will be on my way to Chicago. Don’t think it will actually sink in until I get there.
Here’s an update on what’s happened since my initial blog..
James, my boyfriend of 2 years, broke up with me last week. So needless to say, this past week has been really rough, and filled with hurt. But in all of this hurt, I think I have finally grasped what it means to truly LET GO AND LET GOD! God has shown me that He has different plans for my life than I once did, and I can’t wait to see how He will work through me over this next year!
“It’s a good thing the Spirit intercedes on our behalf, stepping in to protect us from what we think we want and helping us not to settle for what we think we need.” – Shane Claiborne
I put in my two weeks at the nursing home. I truly love the residents that I care for and also the amazing staff that I work with there. I will miss all of them and will never forget them. Tonight at work, Mary (one of my residents) hugged me, kissed me on the cheek, told me that she loved me and that she doesn’t know what she would do without me. It’s the little everyday things like this that truly make a dark week a little bit brighter.
And last but most definitely not least.. I found out who my EGP team mates are! So to Jeff, Ashleigh, Meredith, Carrie and Jeremy.. getting to know all of you this past week has been awesome! We haven’t even got there yet, and we’re already working great as a team, figuring out who will bring what and all the details. Jeff, we are blessed to have you as a team leader and appreciate all the work you are doing to ensure that things go smoothly. All of you seem so amazing and I can’t wait to meet you all in person in 17 days!
Love,
Tanya
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